Fly in the Ointment

Taddies and Gentlefrogs, do you find it difficult to hop out of bed in the morning?

Do you fly into a rage at the slightest provocation?

Do you find it hard to be spawntaneous?

Are you unhoppy?

Sad frog face made out of inner workings of an outlet. Text = I'm so unhoppy.
Then you might be suffering from B.G.I.E.S. or Being Green Isn’t Easy Syndrome.

Although first thought to only affect those made of felt, B.G.I.E.S has been reported among frogs of all materials.

Circuit board that looks like a frog. Text = It's hard to admit you're blue when you're green.

But don’t worry, we here at Pfrogzer Pharmaceuticals have developed a new medication to treat B.G.I.E.S. just for you:


Just apply our ointment twice a day and you’ll be as glad as a tadpole. As jolly as a pollywog.

Just listen to these toadstimonials:

Three Ikea mitten holders that look like frogs. Speech bubbles say, "Before Flyoxitine, all I did was hang around my pad." "But now I'm toad-ally cured." "I'm hoppy again, thanks to Flyoxitine."

Warning. Side effects may include: unbridled hoptimism, spawntaneous banjo solos, warts, croaking, and the irresistible urge to posthumously don a top hat and sing the song Ragtime Gal.


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