Keeping an Eye on You

/ K. Callard

Attention, readers! We have taken over this blog to point out an extreme injustice. This blog has shown an unfair preference for faces of the binocular variety. We monocles-

Silver Birch tree with knot holes that look like a single large eye centered over a mouth. Grumpy eyebrows and arms have been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "Um, Iris? Monocles are already a thing. You can't call us that."

Okay, sorry.

We uni-eyes-

Interior of a computer. A large circle "eye" sits above a rectangular mouth. Speech bubble says, "Really? Uni-eye? How do you expect them to take us seriously?"

Fine!

We of the “only-one-eye” variety-

One round leafy plant "eye" over a smiling tulip leaf "mouth." Eyeball has been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "I think the word you're looking for is cyclops."

Right. Fine.

We cyclopses-

Another silver birch tree with dark knots that look like a grumpy cyclops face. Arms with hands on hips have been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "Cyclopes. The plural of cyclops is cyclopes."

You know what? I give up. Maybe we don’t deserve a spot on this blog. I’m outta here.

Playground with a clear round dome that looks like an eye over a square window that looks like a mouth. Arms and surprised eyebrows have been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "Was it something we said?"
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