So sorry to disappear on everyone, but back at the end of November I hit my head and got a concussion, and I’ve been off screens ever since. Such a shame, since I was working on a bunch of great Xmas posts.
I’m even sorrier to say, I’m not really back. Screens are still hard on my head, so I have to limit how much I use them, and since you can’t really write a blog without them…
But
I’m not shutting down completely.
I’ll still be back to make occasional posts. After all, it’s not like I’ll stop seeing faces everywhere. But my posts won’t come on a schedule.
So, if you want to stay in the loop, I suggest you subscribe to the RSS feed so you won’t miss any posts.
Attention, readers! We have taken over this blog to point out an extreme injustice. This blog has shown an unfair preference for faces of the binocular variety. We monocles-
Okay, sorry.
We uni-eyes-
Fine!
We of the “only-one-eye” variety-
Right. Fine.
We cyclopses-
You know what? I give up. Maybe we don’t deserve a spot on this blog. I’m outta here.
I know they say not to post in the heat of the moment, but current events have me steamed up, and I refuse to wait until I cool off. And while this post may draw some heat for being “too political,” I say too bad.
I don’t go around looking for faces, I swear. But sometimes when I’m out, things line up just right, and next thing you know I’m snapping a pic of a house wearing a cool hat and sticking its tongue out at me. Because when I see a face, I just can’t let it slide.
Good morning, everyone. Thank you for coming out to our Emoji Stand-In Auditions. As you already know, our current emojis have been working hard, and would like the chance for a break, so we’re hoping to find some lookalikes to temporarily take over for smaller appearances: texts, DMs, that kind of thing.
Let’s see who’s first. Shocked?
Not bad. There are a few key differences, though that might make it obvious you’re not the original.
Be that as it may, it’s not your only identifying feature. *CoughMouthCough*
Unfortunately this is a very subjective business, and we owe it to our clients to only cast actors who will be able to replace them unnoticed.
Moving on.
Let’s see WTF.
All right, I can kind of see the resemblance, but I think you’re missing a few key features. Like a head.
Who’s next? Sad? Go ahead.
Now we’re getting closer. Not bad shape, decent brow work, colour’s a bit off, but we could work with that…
Can you cry on demand? Let’s see some tears.
Well, sorry, but I’m afraid you’re out. Can’t have a sad emoji who can’t cry.
Next!
Somebody give me something happy.
You’ve got the expression down pat. Come back when you’ve taken care of those wrinkles. Maybe see if you can get a colour enhancement while you’re at it. Then we’ll talk.
Right. I think that wraps up our auditions for today. Thanks for coming out. While we didn’t manage to cast any lookalikes today, a few of you made strong showings. Keep practicing, get some work done, and maybe we’ll be seeing you in texts soon!